What’s Your WHY?

Have you ever started a new exercise program, or nutritious eating plan, only to get derailed from your plan after a few weeks (Hello, New Years’ Resolutions!)?

I think the most important part about starting a new habit is KNOWING YOUR WHY.

Welcome to Mindfulness 101!

I am honored to introduce you to this beautiful practice that so powerfully changed my life.

And I want to honor the step YOU have taken by joining this course — you are making a commitment to living with greater presence and intention. That is a commendable step — and it’s something that only YOU can do (no one else can do this important work for you!)

Over the next week, you’ll get access to the seven days of course content so you can work through the material at a leisurely pace. But I know that for some of us it’s easier if we can just plow through the content all at once, and then figure out how the practices are going to work for us. If you’d like to do that, you can click the button below to unlock all seven days (20+ total lessons) immediately.

Click here to purchase your ALL-ACCESS pass

Let me start by sharing a bit about myself…

I came to the practice of mindfulness almost 10 years ago, as I struggled with significant postpartum depression and anxiety. For the longest time, I thought I could just “power through” and things would eventually get better.

But I needed help. And when I finally got the courage to visit my doctor and admit that I was struggling, one of the various “treatment modalities” that was recommended to me was practicing mindfulness.

I wasn’t so sure…

Mindfulness wasn’t everywhere in the news back then like it is now, and it just sounded weird to me. I was quite certain I did NOT have the time to just sit and breathe — I was working full-time (teaching high school social studies), I had two little children, and I had to go to Target! And even if I did have the time, how could just sitting around doing nothing help?

But I really wanted to get better, so I tried it. I sat down, I counted my breaths, I watched my monkey mind do its thing…. and then I did it again the next day. And the next day. It was weird sometimes. It was amazing sometimes. It was boring sometimes. But I kept doing it.

I decided to learn more about mindfulness as I continued to practice. I discovered that I could just notice my thoughts, and not be yanked around by them. At the worst of my depression, I would spend most of my 30-minute morning commute with an endless self-critical loop in my head: “I’m a terrible mother. I never should have had kids. They are going to be so messed up because of me. I can’t believe I said that this morning. I just know the afternoon is going to be worse…” and on and on…

As you can imagine, it was a terrible way to start my day, and it only fed my negative mood.

But with mindfulness, I realized that THERE WAS SOMETHING I COULD DO ABOUT MY RUMINATING MIND! I just thought this way of speaking to myself was normal. I thought everyone did this to themselves on their way to work (and, sadly, many of us do).

I began to recognize my thoughts as thoughts. When I noticed those negative thought patterns, I would say, “No, right now I’m just thinking I’m a terrible mother.” It’s a minor shift, but it’s a powerful one. “I am not my thoughts. I don’t have to believe what I am telling myself.”

I share this story with you because it is just one of the incredibly powerful transformations I have seen in my life since I began practicing mindfulness. The more aware I became of the stories I was telling myself, the more I was able to engage with the reality in front of me. I could parent, and teach, and live, from a place of presence and receptivity.

Virtually everyone I know who has a dedicated mindfulness practice describes a similar transformation. It’s like we can’t keep quiet about this amazing thing we’ve discovered that makes our lives so much better!

I began teaching mindfulness to my students, to my colleagues, and to my children. I embarked on formal mindfulness training with Mindful Schools, and earned my certification as a Mindful Schools Instructor. Now I’ve been able to merge my 17 years of classroom experience with my mindfulness background, and I can share this powerful, beautiful practice with students, teachers, families, … and YOU!

Over the next week, you will get an email from me each day with a link to your Mindfulness 101 lesson. Plan to spend about 5-10 minutes reading or viewing the course content, and then a few minutes practicing the techniques in the lesson. It’s important to not skip the actual practice! This is where the real benefits of mindfulness happen (more on that tomorrow…)

I think the most important part about starting a new habit is KNOWING YOUR WHY.

You may not want to go to the gym, but YOU WANT TO BE HEALTHY AND FEEL GOOD IN YOUR BODY. That’s your why.

Some mornings, I don’t want to get out of my comfy bed, but I WANT TO BE CALM AND PRESENT, AND START MY DAY WITH GORGEOUS SILENCE. That’s my why… and it’s what sustains my practice.

Practice: What’s YOUR Why?

Why do you want to learn mindfulness? For me, it was to figure out how to relate to the thoughts in my head and manage the stressors of being a working mom.

What’s YOUR why? Do you need to discover better ways to calm down? Do you just want a bit more silence and peace in your days? Do you want to be more present with your family? Do you want to be less reactive? Do you need help working with a difficult situation or painful emotions? Do you just need some space?

There are many things that brought you here today, to reading this lesson and learning more about mindfulness.They might be the same things that led me to mindfulness… or they may be your own personal reasons.

Knowing your WHY, knowing why this is important to you, is HUGE. It’s what will help you stick to the practice on those days when you think, “I just don’t have time!”

So spend some time today thinking about your why. Find a comfortable place to sit down, get rid of distractions for just a few minutes, and close your eyes and take a few deep breaths. Ask yourself WHY. Why do I want to learn mindfulness? (Use the download below to guide you).

(You can even play the “Why Why Why?” game. Once you have an answer — like “I want to be more peaceful” — ask yourself again, “Why? Why do I want to be more peaceful?” Maybe you’ll discover, “I’m tired of snapping at my partner and always saying things I later regret.” And then you ask AGAIN, “Why? Why do I want to be more peaceful in how I speak?” And you might realize, “I need to be peaceful and calm so I can repair the important relationships in my life.”)

That’s a powerful WHY.

Once you know your why, WRITE IT DOWN. There’s just something about the physical act of writing, and committing our words to paper, that makes them take on a deeper resonance and significance. You could even post this near your desk or your nightstand or somewhere where it will remind you of your intentions. You can use the download below for this.

Tomorrow, we’ll get into the details about what mindfulness is, and I’ll guide you through a short, relaxing meditation.

You may not want to go to the gym, but YOU WANT TO BE HEALTHY AND FEEL GOOD IN YOUR BODY. That’s your why.

Some mornings, I don’t want to get out of my comfy bed, but I WANT TO BE CALM AND PRESENT, AND START MY DAY WITH GORGEOUS SILENCE. That’s my why… and it’s what sustains my practice.

Click here to download your WHY worksheet!
p.s. This could be the most important lesson of this course — if you don’t know WHY you’re trying to make a change in your life, all the videos and meditations and lessons that follow won’t be much help, and you’ll likely continue the habits that lead to stress and frustration and overwhelm. I encourage you to approach the next seven days as an invitation to a new way of being in the world, so please take the time to consider your goals and intentions. I’ll see you tomorrow for the next step in your journey!